Underwear

Ok so at Christmas, in my family, stockings are a pretty big deal. They arent just random candies and goofy gifts, they have like really good stuff in them. I think mom went all out one year and set the bar so high she could never come down. Anyhoo...one thing she always puts in them is underwear (shoved way at the bottom in the toe, incase we had extra company we wouldnt pull them out and get embarassed. So thoughtful.) I remember the year when she got us thongs. Gone were the days of flowery briefs and into young womenhood. Than there were the underwear from a couple years ago. Both Candice and I dug to the toe and pulled out these black and white striped briefs. As we took off the ribbon and unrolled them...they just kept unrolling. They were seriosuly HUGE. We looked at each other, than at mom, in total confusion. "What the heck mom? Why are they so huge?" "Ya, I dont know. Im sure I got the right size. They must just run big!" Needless to say, we laughed. Hard. Like...they were THAT big.

Starting about 4 months ago Ive had a movie flashback every morning while getting dressed. Chris Farley. David Spade. Tommy Boy. Yup...'fat guy in a little coat.' Only my referance was to my underwear. I just kept squeezing into what was clearly a drawer full on pre pregnancy panties. I did my best with the stretchy ones but who was I kidding. Every morning I would look at those black and white striped briefs....absolutely DETERMINED to not try them on in fear of them fitting.

Than today...it happened. My uncomfortable badonkadonk convinced me to try them on. And yes, they fit. Damnit. I REALLLLLLLLY cant wait to meet this little girl...but I REALLLLLLLY hate being pregnant.

Uhg.