Landon's school conference

Kirk and went to Landon's parent teacher conference today.

I felt anxiety going in. In a lot of ways, I felt like I was being assessed at my parental skills. The last 3.5 years of shaping this little dude was finally going to be reflected back to me. Between my efforts and God's design of his individual little spirit....what would they say? There was a chance that he could be a totally different kid at school than at home. It happens, right?

Alas, he had rave reviews. High marks in all areas.

"Excells"

"Very very good for his age, especially for boys."

"Such a joy to have in class. I just love that smile each morning."

"He is frequently the one to recognize the larger numbers on the calendar."

Im so so proud of my little guy. And proud of me too. There are so many pressures we put on ourselves as moms. Comparing to other moms and other kids and books and blogs and facebook posts. But, I did good. We, did good. Im glad, because we really tried. We desire more than anything to help form intelligent, loving, respectful, passionte, God loving children. It is the most important life goal for me.

So today affirmed not only my amazing little boy who I cant wait to keep watching grow and grow and grow....but my efforts as well. I know that Landon is his own person. I can teach and shape and direct but I cant control him. Even at 3.5 years old, he makes his own decisions, has his own views and desires. I love that. But I know that a lot of who he will be will come from us and what we instill in him.

So, we all passed our first test:)

I know I know....

Ok, I could easily give the old "I know its been awhile, I suck at blogging, Been busy, Going to try and be better...." blah blah blah.

The reality is, I had Lydia, didn't make blogging a priority, and after awhile felt like I had so much to catch up on just the thought of blogging it all gave me anxiety.

So, I will begin blogging again. Well, maybe. That's the plan anyway. No recaps though. Just starting from this point on.

So there ya have it.....

Lydia Joy Luoto!!!

This is really not exciting news for my readers, considering she is 2 weeks old today and anyone who reads my blog already knows the news...but for the sake of keeping my blog up to date I needed to do an official entry:)

Birth Story:

Monday morning, Aug.9th, I had my weekly appointment. I had measured 3 cm and 75% effaced which was what I had been for the last week and a half. She had encouraged me to not get discouraged and that I may even go a few days over. I accepted it and left.

About 2:00 while Landon was napping I went into Lydia's room and sat in the glider. I turned on my worship music and just prayed for my daughter. I prayed over the struggles I had faced over the last year, causing me to find it almost impossible to connect with the baby and yearning so deeply for atleast a profound meeting experience. After so many months of struggling to feel the Lord, I knew he was there with me. I finally felt that warmth on my heart and a comfort from Him. Enough to bring me tears, which as contrast as it is to the common pregnancy women....were like stone for me the previous several months. I felt a pure....JOY. I than was not only determined to just NOT be PREGNANT anymore...I wanted to meet my little girl. So, I boiled some water, made myself some raspberry lead tea (two bags this time!) and got the ole breast pump out. As I sat there in my awaited daughters room, rocking back and forth, drinking my tea, pumping away, and listening to worship music....I began having the braxton hicks contractions. Id had them since 16 weeks, but these were consistently 5 minutes apart. This continued for several hours but nothing progressed. Finally in the evening as Id sat watching TV waiting for the contractions to get stronger, I went to bed at 10:30 assuming that if this was the real thing, they would end up waking me up.

Sure enough at 12:00 I woke up to cramping. I laid there and waiting for another one, which sure enough 5 minutes later it came. Definitely more painful, but far from labor pains. I got up and went to the bathroom, all the while the contractions continuing. Anxiety kicked in. Is this it? Im not sure. Im supposed to know what this feels like on the second one. I finally woke up Kirk at 12:30 and told him I didnt know what to do. He said that we should call his mom and have her come down. It would take her a bit anyways so just in case we should get her on her way. By 1:30 we were headed into the hospital and sure enough they were getting a little more intense (still not necessarilly....painful.) Id called ahead so they were ready for me. I got all hooked up and at about 2:00 the lady came in and checked me. You can imagine my dismay when she said I was still at 3 cm 75%. And of course they had sort of stopped once we had gotten there. She had me wait a half hour than was going to check me again. When she left I looked at Kirk and said, 'They seriously dont even hurt anymore," and like clockwork I had one that definitely rocked me. It was only followed by another and another getting worse and worse. She came back in at 2:30, still measured the same. She had us walk the halls (which were totally quiet thanks to an empty birthing center! peaceful....). The doctor wasnt going to have me admitted until I had progressed. So, we walked the halls of hell. I say this because every two minutes I had a contraction worse that the previous. Ridiculous pain. Tears and hyperventilating pain. Finally at about 3:30 she had us pick a room and called the midwife down. By the time she got there and I got up in the bed to be checked it was 4:00a. I was at 8 cm and 100% effaced. Yes, I literally labored almost the whole thing in the hallways. And I dont know WHY movies, TV, even the educational videos show people laboring standing up....BUT WHAT THE HECK!!!!???? The worst position possible. Once I got in the room and was able to get on the birthing ball, have my music playlist going, and having Kirk press on my back, I was able to take on the labor.

I had them immediately call the anesthesiologist because at the rate I was going I didnt have much time and I wanted something for the pushing. Given the struggle I had gone through emotionally during my pregnancy, my prayer had been that the moment she was born would be magical. For the reason, I didnt want to be in excruciating pain or mentally out of it. I was able to get the intrathecal (prayer #1 answered) because I was so far along and moving so quickly. They administered that at 4:45a at 9 cm. At 5:30 they checked me again and I was complete, but her head was still up behind the cervix some. She had be push on a contraction to see how low her head would go and sure enough I pushed it right on through! My contractions had slowed so they were going to do a small dose of pitocin to true and kick them up so the uterus would push her down more but I got her on my own in one push! (prayer #2 answered). They set up for pushing and at 6:10 I started to push. I think it was maybe 3 pushes total and my daughter was here! (Note: I had put together a special playlist because I swear with Landon it is what got me through. I didnt get to hardly listen to it since it all went so fast but when I started pushing the song In Christ Alone was playing....a really special song to me. And, even more, when they handed her to me and she laid on my chest I noticed the song Lullaby was playing. Funny enough, I had secretly hoped that song would be playing when she was born. Prayer #3 answered). Oh, and prayer #4....it was a GIRL!!! lol

Lydia Joy Luoto

August 10, 2010

6:20am

7 lbs 11 oz 21 inches

It really was another perfect labor. I am so grateful and feel so blessed to have had two such special labors bringing my children into the world. The Lord was ever present and I couldn't ask for a more perfect experience. And, I honestly am without words at how amazing my husband was. Encouraging, loving, supportive, emotional. He, too, was truly perfect.

Grrrr

Ok, so since I switched email addresses and google only lets you have one account, I had to start a new google account which meant my blog had to be transferred to a different account. Luckily I was able to save the blog and posts but for whatever reason ALL of the photos I have ever uploaded to the blog are gone! (Well, I still have them but the blog doesn't recognize their path).

Just thought I would express my frustration and also if you're wondering why they aren't showing up...there ya go.

:(